Eulogy

My name is Kay; I first met Major Dewey Wayne Balcombe in 1999. I received a message over the Internet from a man in the US, he told me his name was Mike and asked me if Warnbro Beach road was near my place. I told him it was only a couple of miles from my home.

He told me where his folks lived and sent me a file, which I printed out; it was a newspaper article showing a Mike Balcombe observing Memorial Day. He asked me if I would take it over to his parents place.

I went over there and introduced myself to Dewey and Jessie Balcombe. I explained how I had been chatting to their son Mike on the Internet and gave them the newspaper article. They invited me in and made me coffee in a Stars n Stripes mug. We became very close friends; they were among the first friends I made since arriving here from Victoria the year before.

They invited me to my first thanksgiving dinner at their home, and at bbq's and other gatherings I met many of their friends, it is good to see some of you here today.

I had lost my father when I was 2 and my grandparents brought me up, it is because of my experiences with them that I had always enjoyed a good relationship with elderly folk. We became very close friends, being there for each other - a lifeline.
When Mike lost his wife tragically, Dewey and Jessie rushed to be by his side in the US. I told them to stay as long as they needed to, and looked after their house and pets while they were gone.
Once when Dewey was hospitalised and only close family members could visit I told the nursing staff "You have to let me visit him, I am his lover" The look on the nursing staff faces when Jessie and I walked in together the next day was priceless.

Major DW Balcombe had a distinguished military career.  He was born on 8th Oct 1918. Enlisting in the US Army on the 16th Nov 1933 at the age of 17, he was
Commissioned on the 25th Oct 1952 whilst serving in Korea.
He served in Panama, Philippines and China prior to WW2 1933-41.
During WW2, he served in the South Pacific including New Guinea, Solomon Islands, Paluan Group, Japan, Korea, and Australia.
Major DW Balcombe was awarded the Silver Star Medal for Action in the Philippines in WW2.
He received the Legion of Merit for Action in the South West Pacific during WW2,
a Bronze Star for action in the Philippines and Korea, 3 Purple Hearts for wounds received in the Philippines and Korea, a Combat INF (infantry) Badge with star for WW2 and Korea, and a Parachute Badge in 1940.
He retired on the 30th Nov 1963 after having served his country for 30 years.

He loved talking about his army experiences, but sometimes when you added things up you knew he was fabricating bits. He was very patriotic. I remember he cried when the twin towers were hit
Dewey and I shared an interest in wartime songs. I have a fond memory of him making a tape up for me after he heard me trying to sing along with Vera Lyn's "White Cliffs of Dover" on the radio. I don't think he appreciated my singing.  He loved Frank Sinatra, to the point where he often got ragged by his friends about it

He met a lovely young woman named Jessie - she was born in Perth, raised in freo, they married in 1948. Dewey had three children - Bob (from Dewey's from his first marriage) Then Dewey and Jessie had Roger (dec) and Mike.

Mike said, " Please just tell everyone that Dad was the finest role model a son could ever ask for. As the years went by, I realized that all his advice made sense."

Bob asked me to tell you "Dad was a soldier thru and thru, as am I because of him. I love him dearly, and will miss him even more."

Dewey and Jessie came to western Australia to live in 1986 after they bought the house in Warnbro beach road off Jessie’s sister; they came here because it was what Jessie wanted.
He never gossiped about anyone, he had no time for gossip, accepted people as they were, but didn't tolerate fools too well 

He spoke fondly of Doreen and Andy (navy), they go back a long way, Andy died a couple years ago, Jessie, Dewey, Doreen n Andy use to get together and play cards and swap stories, Dewey loved Doreen's cooking and was looking forward to having xmas dinner there this year

In October last year Dewey's life was shattered when Jessie suffered a massive stroke; we went up to Fremantle hospital every day for months until Jessie was placed in Shoalwater nursing home. During those trips Dewey and I shared lots of experiences and we got to know each other even better.
He told me he wished he could trade places with Jessie, he knew she wouldn't like being in her situation.

Dewey could be demanding, autocratic and short on the please and Thank you’s, but underneath that tough exterior I discovered a man who was loyal and caring towards his wife, sons and close friends, he was a very intelligent man, no matter what subject came up he could contribute. He visited his wife every day, sometimes twice a day and always spoke fondly of her.

He may have been a small man in stature, but where his heart was concerned, he was a very large man.

What else can I say about Dewey? He was a poor carpenter, his tables n desk were wobbly
Things I remember about Dewey:  He loved onion, kabana, and cheese and I used to smuggle things like that into the nursing home

He enjoyed his McDonalds, he would order a big Mac with double cheese, thinly sliced onion and cut into quarters, a chocolate thick shake. I used to pick him up from the nursing home and take him out, he loved the outings and whenever I helped him out of the car he would hug me and tell me that he loved me

He loved peanut butter n onion sandwiches, especially on my home made bread.
He loved my chicken veggie pies, often had 2 a day, week in, week out

He joked about wishing he was 20-30 years younger and chasing me, he reckoned I shouldn't be alone and continued to tell people we were lovers.
As time went by, Dewey become even more frail, I often took him shopping, paid his bills, cooked him meals and on a few occasions I stayed over night.

On more than one occasion I had to call the ambulance for him.
It was obvious he wasn't coping well, neither his neighbours nor I could be there for him 24 hours a day and eventually he went into Shoalwater.

I really miss him, I miss our talks, the outings, miss his advice, counsel, support and his hugs. He loved my hugs, he has always called me Katy

Many times he told me how much he appreciated what I did for him, Expressed his love for me and treated me like a daughter.
As someone who never knew her real dad - that meant a lot, I felt proud to be considered family, and yes I loved him as if he was my dad and I miss him.

Thank you. For taking the time to read this